A Simple Way to Support Your Nervous System
How gentle, slow breathing can help your body move from stress and tension towards calm and regulation. Have you ever noticed that when you are stressed, worried or overwhelmed, your breathing changes? You might start breathing faster, taking bigger breaths, breathing high into your chest, or even breathing through your mouth. Now think about what happens when you feel genuinely safe and relaxed. Your breathing naturally becomes quieter, slower and more effortless. Our emotional state can influence how we breathe, but the way we breathe can also send signals back to the nervous system.
One important pathway in this communication is the vagus nerve. Understanding this connection can give us another simple and practical tool for managing stress, anxiety and nervous-system dysregulation.
The vagus nerve is the tenth cranial nerve and is one of the major communication pathways between the brain and many parts of the body. It travels from the brainstem through the neck and into the chest and abdomen, connecting with organs including the heart, lungs and digestive system. The vagus nerve plays an important role in the parasympathetic nervous system, often described as the body's "rest and digest" system or "healing state"
Our autonomic nervous system is constantly adjusting to what is happening around and within us. When we perceive danger or pressure, the sympathetic nervous system can become more active. Our heart rate may increase, our muscles prepare for action and our breathing may become faster.
This response is incredibly useful when we need to respond to a genuine threat.
The problem is when our body remains in a state of stress long after the stressful situation has passed. This can happen when we experience ongoing work pressure, relationship difficulties, trauma, chronic pain, illness, poor sleep, anxiety or simply too many demands for too long. We can begin to feel as though our nervous system is constantly "on."
Breathing is something we do thousands of times every day, mostly without thinking about it. This makes it a particularly interesting tool for nervous-system regulation.
Research suggests that slow breathing can increase vagally mediated heart-rate variability (HRV) during breathing practice. Slow breathing also influences the interaction between breathing, heart rate and the body's blood-pressure regulation system.
One of the most important things to understand is that slower does not necessarily mean deeper. In fact, taking large, exaggerated breaths can sometimes make you feel more uncomfortable or light-headed. The goal is not to fill your lungs as much as possible.
Instead, think: Slow. Soft. Quiet. Nasal breathing
This is very consistent with functional breathing and Buteyko principles, where the focus is on breathing appropriately for what the body needs rather than simply taking bigger breaths.
Why does the out-breath matter?
You may have noticed that taking a longer, relaxed exhalation can feel calming. There is a physiological reason for this. Vagal activity to the heart varies with the breathing cycle, with vagal influence increasing during exhalation. Slow breathing also interacts with the baroreflex—the body's system for regulating blood pressure and heart rate. This is one reason many relaxation and breathing practices place emphasis on allowing the out-breath to be gentle and long. But there is no need to force a long exhale. If you have to strain, hold your breath or "push" the air out, you may actually be creating more tension.
The nervous system responds better to safety than force.
A simple vagus nerve breathing exercise
You don't need special equipment to begin.
Try this simple practice for around 3-5 minutes, 3-6 times per day.
1. Get comfortable
Sit upright or lie down somewhere comfortable.
Allow your shoulders, jaw and face to soften.
2. Breathe through your nose
Gently close your lips and breathe through your nose. Try to keep the breath quiet.
You should not feel as though you are struggling to get enough air.
3. Notice your lower ribs and abdomen
Place one hand gently over your lower ribs or abdomen. As you breathe in, allow the lower ribs and abdomen to move naturally. As you breathe out, allow them to gently relax.
Don't fill your lungs or take huge breaths, just breathe enough.
4. Gradually slow your breathing
First, notice your natural breathing rhythm. Then try making the breath just a little slower than usual. For example:
Breathe in gently for 3 seconds. Breathe out comfortably for 4–5 seconds.
If this feels uncomfortable, shorten the count. There is no prize for breathing as slowly as possible.
5. Keep the breath light
This is particularly important. Your breathing should feel quiet, gentle and easy.
If you become dizzy, tingly, uncomfortable or feel as though you need to take a large breath, return to your normal breathing.The Oxygen Advantage approach highlights the importance of keeping breathing light as well as slow, because slowing the breathing rate while taking unnecessarily large breaths can still result in excessive ventilation.
6. Notice what changes
Rather than trying to make yourself relax, simply become curious.
You might notice:
your shoulders dropping
your jaw relaxing
your heart rate settling
your hands becoming warmer
your thoughts becoming less busy
your body feeling heavier
a greater sense of calm or sleepiness
Or you may notice very little at first. That's okay too.
Nervous-system regulation is a practice, not a performance.
You don't need to "switch off" your nervous system
One thing I often explain to clients is that the goal isn't to be calm all the time.
We need our sympathetic nervous system. It helps us exercise, concentrate, respond to challenges and act when something requires our attention. Healthy nervous-system regulation isn't about staying permanently in "rest and digest." It is about developing flexibility—being able to move between activation and recovery when the situation changes.
You might need to be highly alert during an emergency and then be able to return to a calmer state afterwards. This ability to move between states is an important part of resilience.
Think about it as an internal thermostat, where when regulated the temperature is just right, if you're in fight and flight or freeze, the temperature is too hot or too cold.
Breathing can become a bridge between the body and mind
For many people, talking about stress can be helpful. But sometimes we understand intellectually that we are safe while our body still feels tense, restless or on high alert.
This is where body-based approaches can be particularly useful. Breathing gives us a way to work with the body directly. Rather than saying: "I need to stop feeling anxious."
we can begin with something much simpler: "Let me notice how I'm breathing right now."
Then we can gently experiment with making the breath quieter, softer and more comfortable. This can become a practical bridge between mind and body.
How I incorporate breathing into therapy
At Holistic Therapy & Counselling, I use a trauma-informed and holistic approach that recognises that our head and body are connected with wellbeing. Depending on your individual needs, breathing and nervous-system regulation may be incorporated alongside other therapeutic approaches. As a Certified Buteyko Breathing Instructor, I can help you explore functional breathing principles, including nasal breathing, breathing awareness and gentle breathing practices. Breathing techniques may be particularly useful for people experiencing:
anxiety and excessive worry
stress and overwhelm
difficulty settling the nervous system
sleep difficulties
trauma-related symptoms
panic and heightened arousal
chronic stress
chronic pain
feeling constantly "on alert"
rumination and racing mind
Breathing is not a replacement for psychological or medical treatment, and it isn't the right approach for everyone in every situation. It is one tool that can form part of a broader, individualised approach to wellbeing.
Breathing isn't the whole picture
It's also important not to put too much pressure on the vagus nerve. You may have seen social media posts claiming that you can "reset your vagus nerve" or fix a wide range of health problems by stimulating it. The science is more nuanced. Heart-rate variability is influenced by many factors, including breathing, sleep, physical activity, illness, stress and other aspects of our lifestyle. HRV also naturally varies between individuals. So rather than chasing a particular HRV number or trying to constantly "activate" your vagus nerve, it can be more helpful to think about supporting your body's capacity to regulate and recover.
Breathing is one piece of that puzzle. Sleep, movement, connection, nourishment, time in nature, meaningful relationships and appropriate psychological support all matter too.
Other gentle ways to support regulation
Breathing doesn't have to be your only tool.
Other practices that may support relaxation and regulation include:
Humming or singing: These naturally involve longer exhalations and can be an enjoyable way to slow down. Producing physical vibrations in the throat and chest activates the parasympathetic nervous system, lowering your heart rate and reducing stress
Mindfulness and meditation: Bringing attention to the present moment can help interrupt the cycle of constant thinking and worry. Get out of your head and into the body.
Gentle movement: Walking, stretching, yoga and other forms of comfortable movement can help us reconnect with the body and get us out of our head.
Time in nature: A quiet walk outdoors can combine movement, breathing, sensory awareness and a change of environment.
Safe social connection: Feeling connected and supported by other people is an important part of emotional wellbeing.
Touch and body awareness: Practices that help us notice sensations in the body can support greater awareness of tension and relaxation. Stroking your face slowly or from your shoulders down to your elbows can be comforting and relaxing.
What if breathing exercises make you anxious?
This is an important question, particularly for people with trauma histories or panic symptoms. Not every breathing exercise feels calming for everyone. For some people, focusing closely on their breathing can initially increase anxiety. If this happens, you don't need to force yourself to continue. We can instead begin with something less activating—for example, noticing your feet on the floor, feeling the support of the chair, looking around and naming 5 things you can see, 5 things you can hear, walking gently, or simply becoming aware of your surroundings.
Regulation should feel supportive, not like another thing you have to get right.
Small practices can make a difference
You don't have to spend an hour meditating every day.
You could begin with just one minute.
Before answering an important email.
Before going into a difficult conversation.
After finishing work.
When you notice your shoulders creeping upwards.
When your thoughts are racing at bedtime.
Or when you simply realise:
"I haven't taken a proper breath all day."
Pause.
Soften your shoulders.
Close your mouth and breathe gently through your nose.
Slow down the breath slightly and allow the exhalation to be easy and relaxing.
And notice that, over time, these small moments can help you become more aware of the relationship between your breathing, body and emotional state.
Your nervous system is not your enemy
Your body's stress response is trying to protect you. Sometimes it simply becomes overworked or stuck in a pattern of responding to everyday demands as though they are emergencies. Learning to recognise these patterns—and learning ways to support your body back towards regulation—can be an important part of therapy.
At Holistic Therapy & Counselling, I combine evidence-informed psychological approaches with body-based and holistic strategies, including Buteyko breathing, nervous-system regulation, EFT/Tapping, somatic approaches and trauma-informed therapy.
The aim isn't to make you dependent on therapy or a particular technique.
It is to help you develop practical tools and a deeper understanding of yourself so that, over time, you can become more confident in supporting your own wellbeing through life's ups and downs.
There is always hope for change.
If you feel as though your body is constantly in stress mode, you're struggling with anxiety, sleep, trauma or overwhelm, or you simply want to learn more about how breathing may support your nervous system, I would be happy to explore this with you.
Holistic Therapy & Counselling offers trauma-informed counselling and nervous-system-focused support in person on the Sunshine Coast and secure online sessions Australia-wide.
Please note: Breathing practices are not intended to diagnose or treat medical conditions and should be adapted to the individual. If you have a medical condition or experience significant symptoms while practising breathing exercises, seek appropriate medical advice.
GUN MESKANEN HOPKINS
ACCREDITED MENTAL HEALTH SOCIAL WORKER
Certified Evidence-Based EFT and BUTEYKO BREATHING PRACTITIONER
(Medicare refund available)
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